Thought I would start this thread about men. Don't be offended gentleman, only for laughs...

Someone may like to start a similar one about women...lol

“God made woman beautiful and foolish; beautiful, that man might love her; and foolish, that she might love him”


“When women are depressed, they eat or go shopping. Men invade another country. It's a whole different way of thinking.”


Men are like pumpkins. It seems like all the good ones are either taken or they've had everything scraped out of their heads with a spoon.”


“Men are taught to apologize for their weaknesses, women for their strengths.”

'A woman is ironing her bra and her husband notices. He says 'why are you doing that, its not as if you've got anything worth holding up!' She calmly responds with, 'For the same reason I iron your pants'.

'Two men are walking through the forest and come upon a strange device. One picks it up and gasps in shock. 'What? What is it?' the other man asks. 'Its....its ME!' the man responded. His friend, in disbelief grabs the object, and looks at it. 'You daft bugger, its me you fool'. The object they found was a mirror.

'A man is driving along a country road and has a collision with a truck carrying nails. He takes his car, which is now full of dents, to the Auto Mechanics to be fixed. The poor man was obviously a bit of a simpleton, so the mechanics thought they'd have a bit of fun. 'Will it be terribly difficult to fix?' The man asked in earnest. 'Why, no,' the mechanic replied. 'All you need to do is take a deep breath and blow up the exhaust pipe, it'll push all the dents back out.' So the man blew and blew, while the crowd of men gathered, having a good laugh.

'Marriage begins when you sink into his arms...and ends with your arms in the sink'

'Never let your man's mind wander- its too little to be out alone'

'The best way to get a man to do something, is to suggest he is too old for it'

Ah hummm .. coughs...


Nice answers girls, nice answers.

belladonna wrote:



'The best way to get a man to do something, is to suggest he is too old for it'

*Makes a note of that one*

Does a good looking, caring, loving, kind and generous man exist??


Yes he does girls, but unfortunately he probably already has a boyfriend..

I am so glad I stumbled upon this thread today as I was really in need of a good laugh!

How about this one?

"If it has tires or testicles you will have trouble with it"